Hearty har har

Diffuse with humor.  

Patrick and I learned this technique when Connor was just a little lad and we had to deal with his massive meltdowns.

It works!

The more I laugh about this, the easier it is to not cry.  I am so grateful for my friends.  Calling and stopping by to giggle.  (oh yeah, let’s not forget BANGING on my window to scare the crap out of the lady with the heart monitor on)

Hilarious!

We HAVE to joke about this.  We HAVE to.  Because it’s NUTS!

It’s just NUTS…

Way too much information to absorb in such a small amount of time.

I went to the cardiologist yesterday.  We actually know LESS now, after seeing him.

How is that possible?

I’ll tell you how that’s possible.  Because my heart didn’t do it’s “defective groove” while we were in his office.  Because of that he could not confirm any diagnosis.  He did in fact say he’s not Too sure it’s Wolff Parkinson White.

Such a bummer…I was growing quite fond of that particular defect.

I asked him if there was something other than WPW that I’d rather have and he replied with, “let’s hope whatever it is, is found on the right side of your heart”

From what he said, right side of the heart surgeries are Way easier.  A real short surgery.  You know, only 5-7 hours!  Really!!!!   That’s easy??!!!  That’s Short!!???

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!→ (diffuse with humor)

He referred me to an electrophysiologist.  One who specializes in left heart surgeries.  I guess he’s a real whipper snapper in his field.  You know, B-Cuz yesterday was his FIRST day at the office.

(diffuse with humor)← Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

First day, huh??  Awesome!

So, The cardiologist insisted that I spend the next 30 days hooked up to a rather sleek…almost sexy (no, not really) heart monitor.

Patrick says I look like Robocop ← (Diffuse with humor)

In 30 days I will meet Dr. Whipper Snapper with his fancy credentials.  He will then tell me what he thinks about all of this.  At that time, Patrick and I may ask for a referral to the Cleveland Clinic…Depending on how much hair gel he uses (I’m just kidding…Maybe)

I had my Cat Scan and X Rays today.  Let me tell ya how much Fun THAT was!

My gag reflex can’t take much more of that.

Not to mention what happens from the injected contrast dye.

She (the technician) tells me:

You may have a strong metallic taste in your mouth

You may smell a strong odor in your mouth

You may feel like your face is burning

You will then feel that burning sensation go into your throat down into your stomach and into your bottom.

It may feel like your bottom is on fire

You may also feel a sensation like you are urinating.  I assure you.  You are not urinating.

What??!  Are you Serious??!  Hahahahahahahahahahahaha! → (diffuse with humor)

Everything she said would happen, did happen.  I was positive I had peed my pants, but she was correct.  It was just pretend.

Patrick and I laughed about all of it on the way home.  Because we just HAVE to.

  1. cluck. cluck.

  2. cassie |

    Are you being a stupid judging chicken???

  3. Angela |

    I did not know about this Cassie, sorry I haven’t paid too much attention in FB lately, my sister informed me yesterday. We are here if you and the family ever need us for anything.
    Also I highly recommend the Cleveland Clinic, Nate had surgery there (not heart surgery) a few years ago and had a great experience through every process.

  4. Stephanie |

    What a jerk! Who bangs on a window of a woman with a heart monitor on! I swear some people!

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